Gossip
by Mev852
Summary: Gryffindor table is full of loose lips, and more than one rumor is floating through Hogwarts. Implied: Harry/Mrs.Delacour, Harry/Susan.
1. Gossip

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Harry Potter, or any other character in this story.

**A/N:** I wrote this on PnP while blowing off some steam (before book 7 came out) and touched it up a bit since. At least 97 percent of it is still the same, though. I always found gossip at Hogwarts interesting, so this is what I came up with along those lines. I also thought it strange that the word "reckon" has been used in cannon but never in fan fiction. I am trying to remedy that.

**Gossip  
By: Nanio-713**

Ginny and Lavender sat across from each other in the great hall, eating silently. Ginny opened her mouth a few times to say something, only to shut it abruptly and take a bite of her eggs. After three more false starts Ginny finally spoke. "You don't think the rumors about Harry and Susan are…?"

"No," Lavender replied quickly. "Harry and Susan can't be dating. Susan isn't Harry's type, is she? There's no way that's possible."

"Right," Ginny said. "Harry likes girls who are slender and athletic, and Susan is too… curvy for that."

Lavender crossed her legs and ate a piece of bacon before leaning forward and replying. "I mean, she may have as flat a stomach as I do, but her hips are too wide and her thighs are too large. Plus, she's way too top heavy and Harry told you that he prefers a more manageable size on girls." Lavender looked around furtively. Confident that no one was eavesdropping, she continued. "You know, she's rather large in that area for someone so skinny in others. Do you reckon she stuffs, or uses a glamour charm?"

Ginny shook her head. "Those udders of hers have been steadily growing in since before the DA started two years ago. We'd know if they weren't real by now. Merlin, we would've known the day after she started."

"Ginny, just because Susan has D-cups does not give you the right to call them udders."

"Hermione!" Ginny squeaked and spun around to find Hermione standing behind her. The bushy-haired girl's arms were grossed in front of her, closing her robe, and a small scowl marred her otherwise pretty features.

Lavender's eyes narrowed slightly, and her lips thinned, as she looked over to the bookworm who stole away her ex. How did she miss her when looking around? "Hello Hermione, how are you?"

"I'm fine," Hermione answered as she sat down and prepared her breakfast. Hermione watched Ron's ex-girlfriend glare at her as she filled her plate. "I'm a bit curious about why the two of you were bad-mouthing Susan as badly as you were."

"We weren't 'bad-mouthing' her," Ginny said. "We were just talking about whether the rumors about Harry and Susan were true."

"Would you like to contribute to the conversation?" Lavender arched her eyebrow. "You always do seem to fit yourself into everyone else's business, so you should know."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "If there was, or is, anything between Harry and Susan it is their business, and not the business of his twice ex-girlfriend and his best mate's ex."

Lavender decided to ignore Hermione's jibe in lieu of Hermione's new piece of gossip. "Twice ex-girlfriend? You and Harry got back together during the summer?"

"Briefly," Ginny stated.

Hermione scoffed. "You were back together for only two weeks before messing up, and even then you only saw him for one."

Lavender leaned forward, her ears burning with curiosity. "So what happened? Did you two have a big row, or a nasty fight? Did you cheat on him?"

"No!" Ginny snapped and jumped to her feet, red with anger and embarrassment. She noticed a few faces turn with curiosity, and quickly sat down and took a few breaths to calm herself. "Well, if I have to tell the story then I'd might as well start from the beginning. Did you read the Quibbler's article on how Harry destroyed Voldemort?"

"Yeah," Lavender said. "You-Know-Who split his soul into pieces, and Harry destroyed them before the final battle where Harry finished him off."

"That's the official story," Ginny explained. "The unofficial one was that two of them were already destroyed before this summer by Regulus Black, a spy in the Death Eater's during Voldemort's first reign of Terror, and two more were destroyed while Dumbledore was alive. Harry even helped Dumbledore destroy one of them. Harry only had to destroy two more this summer: A locket we found in Black Manor, and Voldemort's pet snake Nagini. When Harry came to the Burrow to pick up Ron and Hermione to go soul searching, I pulled him aside and 'forcibly convinced' him to take me back."

Hermione giggled and shook her head. "You snogged him for five minutes, then started crying and yelling that the breakup was 'unjust.' That was hardly convincing."

Lavender laughed at Ginny for a minute before finally calming down. "I can't believe that worked on Harry. So, what happened next?"

Hermione continued the story. "Harry, Ron, and I went to Black Manor and found out everything about Voldemort's soul from Regulus Black's diary. Then, he found and destroyed the locket, which took us about a week. With only Voldemort's snake and the Dark Lord himself left, we spent the next week at the Burrow. Harry left the burrow at the end of the week, after Bill and Fleur's wedding, because Ginny did something stupid: she slapped Harry."

"Why?" Lavender gasped.

"Because she got drunk, thought I was hitting on Fleur's mum, and called me a pig for trying to shag such an old woman so soon after her Husband's death." The three girls quickly turned to see a disheveled Harry walking up to them in oversized slacks and a green Weasley jumper. His hair was messier than usual and his eyes were bloodshot. "I'm disappointed in you three. It was so easy to walk up and eavesdrop on your conversation. I think I'll need to talk to the old DA group to see how rusty you've all gotten."

"Harry," Hermione cried as she took in Harry's current state. "What happened to you? It looks like you were trampled by a flock of Hippogriffs."

Harry groaned and sat down next to lavender. "Fred and George sent Ron a few bottles of Firewhiskey because you 'made him a man' and we were in the Room of Requirement drinking all night with a few other Gryffindors." Hermione's face turned red and Ginny spit out the pumpkin juice she was drinking. "Ron wouldn't let me leave until we were both plastered. Luckily, I eventually ran into Dobby who gave me a couple bottles of water and some coffee to sober up and lessen the hangover."

Ginny and Lavender turned to glare at Hermione, who was as red as a tomato. "We didn't do anything like that, I swear! I'm still a virgin!"

Harry chuckled, "Not according to Ron, you're not. Hermione, you and Ron are my two best mates, which is why I'm not lying to you right now. Last night Ron claimed that the two of you went all the way. So… is it true that you squeak when you're about to… you know?"

"I'm going to kill that, that, that disgusting pig!" Hermione stood and made to storm off when Harry grabbed the end of her robe to stop her.

"Hermione, calm down before you do anything. If you go up now you'll just be adding validity to his claim. Besides, your plans are better when you're calm and I reckon that you'll want to thoroughly embarrass him."

Hermione grumbled and began eating her breakfast more vigorously. As Harry prepared his own plate, he occasionally picked up Hermione muttering things like "pig," "disgusting," and "transfigure."

As Hermione was busy imagining various torture situations, Lavender was mentally debating which topic to pursue first. "So you broke up with Ginny because she didn't trust you?"

"No," Harry replied. "I broke up with her because I won't accept violence as the first course of action in any sort of relationship."

"But it was an accident!" Ginny wailed.

"That's what Dudley used to say when he was little." Harry retorted. "Even if it was an accident, it seemed instinctual. I won't risk getting into a relationship where I'll be continually hit. I've already had one of those and didn't like it."

Lavender didn't want an argument to start about that particular subject and quickly spoke up. "That must've made the rest of your stay at the Burrow awkward, then."

Ginny shook her head. "He didn't stay at the Burrow in order to avoid a large fuss, so he stayed at Hermione's for the rest of the summer."

"No he didn't."

Ginny and Lavender quickly turned toward Hermione, who snapped out of her thoughts when she heard Ginny's statement. "What do you mean?" Ginny asked. "Harry told me on the train that he spent the rest of the summer at your house."

"No," Hermione explained. "Harry only stayed at my house for a week while we destroyed the locket. After the Final Battle with Voldemort and Nagini, Harry stayed at my house overnight before the Healers proclaimed him healthy enough to be magically transported."

"Where did they take him?" Lavender asked, all thoughts of finishing her breakfast gone.

Hermione turned to Harry, who was holding his head tightly. "You didn't tell anyone, did you?"

Harry groaned. "I was hoping to avoid awkward questions and improper assumptions."

"Tell us what?" Ginny demanded to know. "What didn't Harry tell us?"

Hermione smiled and Harry blurted, "Please, not now. Can you at least wait until after I've eaten?"

"No!" Lavender and Ginny shouted. "Where did he go?"

Hermione smiled and turned to Harry. "Sorry Harry, but this is what you get for celebrating something so perverse with Ron."

"It's not like I had a choice," Harry mumbled as he began eating some hash.

Hermione acted like she didn't hear him. "Harry spent the rest of the summer at the Delacour Mansion."

The entire Gryffindor table, as well as most of Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw turned to look at Ginny and Lavender as they yelled. "HARRY WENT WHERE?!"

"I went to Madame Puddifoots to see if it looked like a fan girl's bedroom all of the time, and not just on Valentines Day!"

Ginny and Lavender were confused about what Harry was talking about, which Harry took advantage of by Grabbing the pair and pulling them back into their seats. He waited until the enough people stopped paying attention to them to continue talking and hissed at them. "I'd rather keep that little fact private to avoid crazy rumors like what you two are thinking, so try not to yell like that again! You almost let the whole school know just now."

"But, but…" Ginny stammered. "Fleur and Bill were on their Honeymoon during that time, and Gabrielle was staying at the Burrow while she and Molly made some final adjustments to "the Newlyweds" new house. Therefore, you were alone with Apolline Delacour in France for three weeks! What are we supposed to think?"

Harry frowned. "That Apolline doesn't want to rob the cradle, and that I have more honor than to sleep with a recent widow."

"But Harry," Ginny argued. "It was already over a month since Mr. Delacour died, and we all know about what mature Veela are like when they no longer have a companion."

"Aren't you being a little judgmental?" Harry asked. "Thinking that all Veela are eager to jump in the sack with anyone is pretty narrow-minded."

"Actually," Hermione said as she finished her juice. "Ginny has some valid points. When a full-blooded Veela loses her companion, she starts seeking new candidates as soon as she's done grieving. Mrs. Delacour had already accepted her husband's death before the wedding, and she did admit to Molly that she was interested in meeting you, since you've survived so many battles against Voldemort."

Lavender's eyebrows rose. "Oh, so you think she wanted to decide whether Harry was compatible with her because he's such a good fighter?"

"It's possible," Hermione admitted. "Veela are, by nature, attracted to men and Veela who are powerful, dominant, charming, or skilled at fighting. It's more than possible that she was eager to meet Harry because he filled at least one of those requirements in her mind."

Ginny scowled. "Well, she sure seemed to think Harry was more than adequate when they were flirting at the party."

"We weren't flirting," Harry defended. "We were just talking. We talked about Fleur, Gabrielle, and what it's like to be judged by the public. She and I had a few things in common and you suddenly showed up and called me all sorts of indecent names."

"But you haven't answered whether or not you've slept with Mrs. Delacour." Ginny exclaimed.

Harry growled "Why should I have to tell you who I've been with?"

"And what about Susan Bones?" Lavender blurted before she could stop herself. "Does she know about your time at Mrs. Delacour's house this summer?"

Harry blinked. "What does Susan have to do with this conversation?"

Ginny was about to answer when Hermione suddenly cried out. "Ronald Weasley, you rat bastard!"

The entire great hall turned to see a disheveled and sickly-looking Ron Weasley standing at the entrance into the great hall, frozen from shock with one foot still in the air. "Wha-"

"How dare you spread lies about me to your brothers?" Hermione screeched as she stood and stomped towards her possibly ex-boyfriend. "I have never let your hands so much as wander and suddenly you're spouting about me as if I were a conquest?"

"Hermione," Harry called as he caught up to her. "Now is not the best time-"

"No, Harry, It is the best time!" Hermione snapped. "Ron, I started dating you because I thought you had finally grown up some, and now you're spreading rumors about how far our relationship has progressed?"

"Her-Hermione," Ron stammered. "I-It's not like that."

Hermione stomped and imposed herself in front of Ron with her hands on her hips. "Then how is it? Harry told me about what happened last night, so don't try lying about why you were 'celebrating' last night."

Harry thanked Merlin that none of the teachers were at breakfast yet, or he would've hated having to explain what Hermione was talking about. "Hermione, this isn't the place to discuss this."

Hermione turned to face Harry. "And why not?!"

Harry stuck pointed behind him at the dining tables and replied. "Because now the entire school is listening in to try and find out what Ron has been saying about you, and why he was celebrating last night."

Hermione's eyes widened as she looked behind Harry. Indeed, every student attending breakfast was tuned into the Golden Trio's conversation, and a few students even stood up and walked forward to hear well. Hermione blushed profusely and spoke. "Well, I'm still going to get my answers. I'll see you later Harry."

Hermione turned around and grabbed Ron's ear, dragging the hung over Gryffindor in order to get some answers out of him. Harry smiled weakly at the gawking crowd and quickly returned to his seat. The room was silent as Harry slowly ate his food with everyone staring at him. Realizing that no official explanation was coming, the crowd eventually lost interest and began talking amongst themselves. Lavender waited five minutes before finally asking what she has wanted to the whole morning. "So, Harry?"

Harry finished his juice. "So what"

"So, what is going on between you and Susan? I hear the two of you have been spending a lot of time together."

Harry seemed reluctant to answer, and was temporarily saved from answer when a feminine voice called out from further down the Gryffindor table. "Harry, do you have a moment."

Harry turned and watched as Susan Bones walked towards him while flanked by Hannah Abbot and Ernie MacMillan. Ernie and Hannah were wearing their school robes, but Susan was not since they weren't required on the weekend. Instead, she wore a tight pair of denim jeans that greatly accentuated her wide hips and powerful thighs, and a yellow jumper that covered her completely but managed to nicely conform around her considerable bust. Harry smiled as Susan stopped next to him. "I'm just finishing up breakfast, so I'm free now."

"Great," Susan said. "I tried starting on Snape's defense essay, but there's a few things about wandless counter-curses that I don't understand. Can you help me out? I'd rather not have to work on this tomorrow."

Harry nodded. "Sure, I'll help you out."

Susan jumped happily and quickly hugged Harry before kissing his cheek. "Thanks Harry! Can we go now, or should we meet in the library in half an hour."

Harry stood up. "We can go now. I'll see you later Ginny, Lavender."

Susan smiled brightly as she dragged Harry away from the group. Lavender noticed the other tow Hufflepuffs didn't leave with Susan, but rather began moving in the direction of some open seats at the Hufflepuff table. "Hey," Lavender called. "Aren't you two going with them to the library?"

"And Ruin Susan's plan?" Ernie scoffed. "No way, I'd never hear the end of it."

"Plan?" Lavender inquired. "What plan?"

Ernie and Hannah smiled mysteriously before answering. "You'll find out soon enough."

Needless to say, Lavender didn't appreciate being left out of the loop.

**The End**

** A/N:** Yeah, I was pretty bored when I came up with this. I hope everyone enjoyed this, and please review.

**EDIT 10/14/2007: **This is not a one-shot, and I've just done some small editing on this chapter. I hope it looks a bit better now.


	2. Badmouthing

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Harry Potter, or any other character in this story.

**A/N:** This is one of those stories meant to play around with. I'm not taking this fic anywhere specific, and honestly have very little to no idea where I'm going with it. I hope you stick around and help me have fun with it, though.

**Gossip****  
Chapter 2: Badmouthing  
By: Nanio-713  
**

"Ow! Ow, Hermione! Let my ear go before you rip it off."

"Ronald Weasley," Hermione barked as she tugged Ron's ear harder. "You and I are going to have a long discussion about what you've been telling your brothers, so I'd shut up and start preparing my case if I were you!"

"Preparing my case? What am I, a prisoner about to be tossed in front of a Judge?"

"I'm about to be the Judge, jury, and _Executioner_ if you don't tell me the truth."

Ron was about to respond, but was prevented from doing so when Hermione suddenly stopped, opened a door, and forcibly shoved Ron in by the ear. After stumbling and catching himself on a chair, Ron had a moment to notice that they were inside the charms classroom when Hermione began shouting. "Now, _why_ do your brothers think that you and I have had sex? I distinctly remember our trips to the Room of Requirement, and we have never done anything more than kiss."

Ron's face became as red as a tomato when he answered. "I never said anything about doing _that _with you to anyone. Where is this coming from, anyway?"

Hermione scowled. "Stop it, Ron. You know exactly what I'm talking about."

"Hermione, I swear that I never told anyone that we were having… doing… that!"

"Oh, then why did your brothers send you some Firewhiskey since you 'became a man,' huh?"

A flustered Ron grabbed a chair and moved to sit down in front of Hermione, who was rigidly standing with both arms folded in front of her. "Hermione, if you're going to accuse me of these things than can we at least sit down and talk about it?"

Hermione snorted and reluctantly fetched a chair to sit down. "Hermione, I never told my brothers that we- that we, you know, did _that_. They sent me the Firewhiskey because I finally gained the nerve to ask you to become my girlfriend."

"Then why did Harry tell me that you were bragging about sleeping with me?"

"I did not!" Ron hissed. "Dean was joking around about how I'd be in your pants soon enough because 'it's the quiet ones you have to watch out for.' I was a bit drunk at the time, so I just ran with the joke. Everyone there knew that I was being sarcastic!"

"Stop lying, Ron." Hermione hissed. "Harry wouldn't lie to me about something like this. If what you said is true, then why did you say that I squeak when I- when I-"

"Because you do squeak when I actually manage to surprise you with a kiss. I was talking about how hard it is to surprise you and why I like to do it. I wasn't talking about anything involving, you know, _sex_."

Hermione would have laughed at Ron whispering the last word if she wasn't so upset. "No, Harry wouldn't lie to me. You are-"

"Telling the truth," Ron interrupted. He reached out and wrapped his hands around Hermione's before gently squeezing them. "Hermione, I really care about you. I wouldn't risk that with some loose gossip and false claims. I know how word travels in this school."

"But…" Hermione pulled her hands away from Ron and began pacing through the room "If you didn't claim anything of the sort, then why would Harry tell me that you did?"

"I don't know," Ron shrugged. "Maybe he was just in a bad mood today or… oh, yeah."

Hermione stopped pacing and turned to Ron. She raised an eyebrow while staring intently at her boyfriend. "Oh? What does 'Oh' mean?"

Ron tried to act nonchalant. "It's nothing, really."

"It obviously cannot be 'nothing,' or you would have told me what 'nothing' was already."

Ron shrugged and sat down once more, while seeming to curl in on himself. "Well, I might have angered Harry into goading you yesterday. Not purposefully, mind you."

Hermione's stance became, if possible, more scrutinizing than before. "How did you get him to become angry at me?"

"Well, I didn't get him angry at you per se." Ron began rubbing the back of his head. "It is- it's a bit complicated."

"Is it? Then you'll just have to tell me everything while getting straight to the point, then."

Ron quailed under Hermione's intense glare. "Well, after Harry and Ginny broke up and we got together, I teased him by saying that neither of us could keep a girlfriend while the other had one. Basically, that one of us would always be single while the other was dating. Last night, after having a few drinks, Harry admitted that he would like to find a girlfriend before graduation…"

~*~

"_You know," Harry said as he held a shot of Firewhiskey between three fingers. "I haven't had a real relationship while at Hogwarts. Cho was my first girlfriend and we never really did anything that officially made us a couple, and Ginny and I were together for such a short time that I don't really think it counts."_

"_Of course it counts," Dean slurred after knocking back a shot. "If no ones else was with 'err, than you's were dating."_

_Seamus chuckled at Dean's slurring before knocking back his own shot. "Yeah, mate. You were officially dating Ginny, so you've got no problems saying that you bagged a girl at Hogwarts."_

_Ron growled for a moment before throwing in his two cents. "I don't like anyone saying that they've 'bagged' my sister, but they've got a point. You have had a relationship while at school."_

"_But it's not the same," Harry whined. "I want a real relationship where I don't have to worry about having to deal with fights over dead friends and worrying about whether battling Death Eaters will destroy my relationship."_

"_Harry, don't worry about that." Ernie Macmillan responded. "You-"_

~*~

"Wait," Hermione interrupted. "I thought that your party was just filled with Gryffindors. Ernie is a Hufflepuff. Who else was there?"

"I don't remember," Ron shrugged. "We had a lot of whiskey and it did start as just Gryffs, but a bunch of people started showing up because Seamus and Dean had invited them. I don't remember exactly who showed up."

~*~

"_Harry, don't worry about that." Ernie Macmillan responded. "You've already defeated You-Know-Who, so that kind of stuff is behind you now. You can choose any girl in Hogwarts now and be guaranteed that, as long as they're single, they will say yes and you won't have to worry about either of those things."_

"_No," Ron blurted. "No he can't. Harry can't break the trio-dating rule, so he's doomed to a bachelor's life."_

_Ernie blinked a few times. "What the bloody hell are you talking about?"_

"_The trio-dating rule. 'All three members of the golden trio can't be in a relationship at the same time.' Think about it; Harry, Hermione, and I have never been seeing someone at the same time. One of us is always single, therefore Harry can't date until after Hermione and I break up."_

"_Do you really believe that?" Harry asked. "Doesn't your dating Hermione break the rule somehow, since you're both in one relationship so I can have the second out of three?"_

"_No," Ron answered. "No, no, no no no, no. __No. I am in a relationship right now, with Hermione, and she is in one with me. That's two relationships."_

"_That's drunk logic," Harry countered._

"_It's still logic, damn it." Ron grumbled. "You can't date until we break up."_

"_Then I mourn your relationship, Ron." Harry replied while grinning like he won a year's supply of Butterbeer._

~*~

"…And that's why I think Harry told you what he did." Ron concluded.

Hermione was silently fuming as she thought about what she had just learned. "Ron, where the hell did you get such a monumentally stupid idea? Why did you argue with anyone, especially Harry, using such an idiotic theory?"

"It was just a joke, Hermione." Ron explained. "I didn't expect him to think that I was serious or anything; I was just fooling around."

"That's still insulting, Ron. It is insulting to him and to us. Honestly, that has to be the dumbest thing that ever came out of your mouth."

"Oh, really?" Ron asked. "If you think I'm so dumb, then why do you even spend any time around me?"

"It's because I like you, Ron." Hermione answered. "And because you usually don't do anything like this without immediately realizing how much of a prat you are being. Now come on."

Hermione grabbed Ron's arms and pulled him out of his seat. Stunned, Ron immediately asked. "Where are we going?"

"We are going to find Harry," Hermione explained. "And once we find Harry you are going to apologize for being a buffoon."

"But what about breakfast?" Ron grumbled.

Hermione huffed as she pushed Ron out of the classroom. "Then you had better hope Harry hasn't finished eating breakfast, if you're hoping to get any."

_**

* * *

**_

Harry never figured out how he got into these situations. Harry understood that fate loved to play games with him, but to go from being accused of dating Susan Bones to be sitting scandalously close to her – _alone_, in the Room of Requirement – while looking over a paper? Well, Harry was sure that it wasn't a coincidence.

Harry fidgeted slightly as Susan slid closer to him, the side of her breast pushing into his arm. Harry could swear that he could probably count exactly how many threads of cotton was being pushed onto that spot, given how aware he was of the sensation. "Well, Harry," Susan breathed into his ear. "What do you think of my paper?"

"Well," Harry gulped. "It certainly is a very nice _paper._" Harry shivered as he felt Susan's arm wrap around his back so that her hand could rest lightly on his other side. He shook his head slightly so that he could focus. "But, I found a couple of small problems."

"Really?" Susan smirked as she rested her chin on his shoulder. She could feel his face get warmer by such close contact. "Well, what mistakes did I make? Are they easy to fix?"

Harry cleared his throat and shifted down the bench, causing Susan to pout as he moved away from her. He moved so that he was facing Susan before continuing. "Yeah, you wrote a paragraph on how you have to think the spell every time you cast wandlessly, when you are only supposed to do that for spells that don't directly effect people like creating a portkey, and most kinds of shields. For more effect-based magic, like the jelly-legs jinx and most attack spells, it's better to visualize what is going to happen. The spells are more effective that way then if you merely think the spell."

Susan smiled as she listened to Harry. She couldn't tell if he was nervous by her signals, or if he was just naïve, but she was determined to snag Harry for herself before the day was done. "Is that the only problem with my paper?"

Harry nodded. "Aside from some nit-picky things, yeah. That's the only major problem. Everything else is just grammar and a couple of sentences that don't make sense, given how you've worded them. All of it is really standard."

"I guess I should have proof-read the paper once more before showing it to you." Susan tried to slide next to Harry again, but he stood up and moved to sit on the other side of the table. "What's wrong? You don't like sitting next to me."

"It's not that," Harry waved off, his cheeks still slightly tinged with red. "It's just that I work better when I sit across from my study partners."

"You always sit next to Hermione when you study." Susan pointed out.

"Yeah, well, Hermione likes to look over peoples shoulders when she is helping people, and Ron always goes berserk after a half hour whenever he sits there. It's easier for everyone if I sit next to her. I can deal with her hissing in my ear whenever I bungle something in my potions essay."

"She doesn't seem to be correcting you much nowadays, though." Susan noted as she leaned forward, crossing her arms on the table. This allowed her to study Harry more closely, while giving him a chance to notice her considerable bust. "Why is that, I wonder?"

Harry smiled and leaned back, taking off his robes to reveal a tight blue shirt and jeans, and placed his hands on the back of his head. The fact that this stretched his shirt to accentuate his muscles did not go unnoticed. "Well, after I defeated Voldemort I stayed with an acquaintance in France so that I can recuperate. I received some tutoring in my worst subjects, like Potions and the History of Magic, while I was there."

Susan stopped ogling Harry for a moment to ask, "Who was this acquaintance?"

Harry shook his head. "I stayed with a friend's mother for the summer. That's all I'd prefer to say about that."

"Oh come now, Harry." Susan giggled. "Your life to date has been far too well documented at this school by your underground fan-clubs for you to be keeping secrets now. Now, who do you know that is from France, or who has a connection to France?" Susan cupped her face with her palm and began to tap a finger on her cheek. "Well, the first and most obvious choice would be Fleur Delacour." Harry's eye twitched, and Susan gasped. "Oh my god, you were staying with Fleur Delacour's family. You only twitch like that whenever you're nervous."

Harry dropped his arms. "Yeah, well, I'd rather no one knew where I was this summer. If people found out that I was staying with a family that includes a Veela, two half-Veela daughters, and no male family members, then they might begin to accuse me or them of committing vile acts over the summer."

"Would they have any basis in truth?" Susan inquired.

Harry glared. "The Delacour's have never done anything that I would ever consider vile, Susan, and neither have I."

Susan was taken aback by his cool tone. "I meant no offense, Harry. I was just curious as to what your relationship with the Delacour matriarch was, now that she's probably looking for a new mate and you were with her all summer."

Harry nodded in understanding. "I'm sorry for the tone I took with you, Suzan, but Apolline and I get along very well and I'll not have anyone insulting her. Every time someone hears that I was staying at the Delacour estate, they assume something perverse happened. Mrs. Delacour was a wonderful woman, and it hurts to think that everyone thinks of her in such a perverse manner. It wouldn't even matter if anything happened or not anymore. Just the mere fact that people suspect her just because she's Veela…"

Harry looked down at his hands, not knowing what else to say. Susan reached across and took one of his hands in hers. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to imply anything. I was just curious about your summer."

Harry smirked. "Yeah, you've been really curious about me recently. You've been around more often since the beginning of the school year." Harry raised an eyebrow at Susan. "Why the sudden interest?"

Susan absently licked her lips and moved around the table to sit by Harry. Susan took his hand in hers again before speaking. "Well, I've always thought you were a great guy, Harry. You are really smart and athletic, and you are really helpful. I just wanted to get to know you better."

Harry chuckled for a moment. "That's what the daily Prophet and Witch Weekly are for. Why are you bothering to hang around me, really?"

Harry slipped his hand out from between Susan's and placed it around her waist. As Harry settled himself into her side, he used his other hand to cup her face and redirect her eyes toward his. "Harry," Susan breath became harsher as the two began to lean slightly toward each other.

However, before either could move another centimeter, Hermione burst into the room with Ron in tow. Harry and Susan burst apart so fast that anyone who was watching them would have thought that they had apparated. "Harry," Hermione cried as she dragged Ron over to their table. "There you are! I've been looking all over for you. Ginny and Lavender said you'd be in the library, and when you weren't there we began searching for all of your usual study areas."

Harry fought to control his embarrassment at nearly being caught kissing by Hermione. "We decided that it would be better to go somewhere other than the Library to talk about our Defense homework, since Madame Pince won't let anyone talk in the Library above a whisper."

"Hello, _Hermione_." Susan growled, a bit miffed that neither of the intruding Gryffindors acknowledged her presence. "How _nice_ of you to stop by. We were in the middle of studying, so can this wait until later?"

"That didn't look much like studying to me," Ron grumbled.

Harry glared at Ron while Hermione elbowed him in the gut. "Seriously Ron, we're here because you've already stuck your foot in your mouth once. Don't stick it back in there again. Now do what we came here to do."

Ron nodded and stepped forward. "Look Harry, I'm sorry I was a prat yesterday and said all that stuff about the 'trio dating rule.' It was a bunch of Dragon crap and I'm sorry."

Harry smiled. "Don't worry about it, Ron. I didn't really care in the first place. I knew you were just joking."

Hermione smiled for a moment before coughing and becoming serious once more. "Alright, now I would like for you to apologize, Harry."

Harry's eyebrows furrowed and his smile disappeared. "What for? What did I do?"

"You lied to me about why they were throwing the party." Hermione announced.

"What?" Harry's brow furrowed even more. "I didn't lie about anything that happened last night."

"Harry, please stop. Ron told me that the party was about our becoming a couple, and not about us allegedly having sex."

"But that was what the party was for. I read Fred and George's note on the crate of liquor. It said, _To Ron, for getting into the Bookworm's knickers._ Ron wouldn't shut up about it all night!"

"That's not true!" Ron stated. "I never said that I slept with Hermione."

"That's true," Harry conceded. "You never said 'Hermione and I had sex,' or 'I got into her knickers.' However, you did tell everyone all about how she acts in bed."

~*~

"_That's drunk logic," Harry countered._

"_It's still logic, damn it." Ron grumbled. "You can't date until we break up."_

"_Then I mourn your relationship, Ron." Harry replied while grinning like he won a year's supply of Butterbeer._

"_Oi, Harry, you're sounding pretty confident there." Seamus piped in. "That's pretty hard to believe, considering Ron's already gotten so far with our dear Granger."_

"_Yeah mate," Dean added. "You really think you can break that up? Anyone who can make a girl howl like Ron did Hermione must be doing something right."_

"_She doesn't howl," Ron corrected. "Hermione's a squeaker."_

"_Woo," Seamus cried. "A squeaker, huh? I never heard of that one. How does it work?"_

_Ron laughed for a while before saying anything. "Something like this isn't like fixing a broom, Seamus. There are subtleties to it all."_

_Dean fell off of his chair laughing. "What do you know about subtleties, Ron?"_

_Ron tried to glare at Dean, but failed miserably. "Look, it works like this; you do everything right and then you hear one squeak, then two, and then next thing you know all of your senses are overloaded."_

~*~

Harry watched Hermione's reactions as she glared at Ron so furiously it was a wonder that he didn't burst into flames. "Need I continue, or can you go back to berating your boyfriend away from here?"

Harry stared at Hermione with his hands over his heart. "Hermione, I swear to you that I did not say any of that! This is what happened."

~*~

"_That's drunk logic," Harry countered._

"_It's still logic, damn it." Ron grumbled. "You can't date until we break up."_

"_Then I mourn your relationship, Ron." Harry replied while grinning like he won a year's supply of Butterbeer._

"_Oi, Harry, you're sounding pretty confident there." Seamus piped in. "That's hard to believe, since Ron's already worked so hard to be with Granger."_

"_Yeah mate," Dean added. "You really think you can break that up? Anyone who can make a girl howl like Ron did Hermione must be doing something right."_

"_What are you talking about?" Ron asked._

"_Oh come on, mate." Seamus cried. " Word around the grapevine is that you've been makin' the beast with two backs with Hermione. Is she as wild as they say the quiet ones are?"_

_Ron turned as red as a tomato, and was too stunned to say anything. "I wouldn't jump into a relationship like that, you sods. Something that serious isn't like fixing a broom, Seamus. There are subtleties to relationships that you Have 'ta grasp first."_

_Dean fell off of his chair laughing. "What do you know about subtleties, Ron?"_

_Ron tried to glare at Dean, but failed miserably. "Look, it works like this; as much as I think about it, I'm not going to do something like that with Hermione just yet." A smirk came upon Ron's face. "It doesn't hurt to dream, though."_

~*~

"_That_ is what happened!" Ron pleaded. "I swear, that is what I remember happening."

"That's what you think," Harry said in a false-sotto voice. "Where there are one million eyes, there are one million stories. I can tell you that, just like Ron, what I remember is what I believe to be the truth."

Hermione's eyes narrowed as she crossed her arms. "Well, there may be a million versions of this story, but there is one universal truth. So, we're going to pick everyone's head until we figure out what really happened."

The next thing that Harry knew, Hermione's hands were wrapped around his and Ron's arms, and Hermione was rushing out of the room with them in tow. As Susan sat alone in the Room of Requirement, there was only one thing that she could think to say. "Goddamn it, if I'd have stuck to the plan then Harry would have stayed. I'm going to _kill_ Hermione for ruining my chance later."

_**

* * *

**_

**A/N:** Have any ideas or suggestions? Feel free to pitch them out to me. Any complaints? I'm not really taking this fic seriously so there's no need to bitch me out about this story.

**Also:** A special thanks to **psykotikwitch** for getting me to get off my ass and write this chapter.

_Edit 11/11/2007: I just fixed a couple of minor grammar mistakes, Nothing major, really._


	3. Information

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Harry Potter, or any other character in this story.

**A/N:** I've gotten lazy, and for that I'm sorry.

**Gossip  
****Chapter 3: Information  
By: Nanio-713**

Hannah often found the most beauty in her environment during the autumn. As a fan of Herbology it was her busiest season with harvesting magical plants, and the time she spent outside often provided her with breath-taking views of Hogwarts grounds during the early part of the season. This is why she managed to convince her boyfriend Ernie, and his best friend Terry, to spend the day reading their defense books in the crisp autumn air instead of the stale interior of Hogwarts castle. Of course, just because she appreciated the scenery doesn't mean that her companions did.

Hannah realized that when she was quietly reading and suddenly heard, "Hey Ernie, I've noticed that you're not wearing any trousers."

Hannah's eyes jumped to Ernie, who was sitting next to her, fully robed and one leg slightly sticking out from under his robes. "What?" Ernie replied. "I can't wear shorts?"

Hannah's nerves calmed once she realized they were just being silly. "It's too cold to be wearing shorts," Terry stated, "Just like it is too cold to be studying outside. Can we go in yet?"

"It's not that cold," Hannah said. "What's wrong with being outside? It's 16 degrees Celsius outside, and the wind is barely blowing. What else could you hope for? I bet it's not going to be this nice again for months."

"Don't mind him, Hannah. Terry is just whining because Susan has proven that he'll never date her again."

"It's not fair!" Terry wailed. "I was only a fourth year at the time. What did I know of dates? I still think I deserve a second chance."

"Face it, Terry. Susan hasn't ever been that interested in you. She said it herself that you're more of a friend to her than any sort of love interest. Give it up and be friendly to Harry once she has him wrapped around her finger."

Ernie eyed his girlfriend uneasily. "Is this plan that Susan cooked up really that good? Harry didn't even get moon-eyed over Cho, and he was really smitten when she approached him."

"Trust me," Hannah assured. "Today she has a plan to tease him so much that he'll be a drooling mess by dinnertime."

"What does this plan entail, anyway?" Terry inquired. "I keep hearing about this plan but you haven't told us anything."

Hannah smiled but didn't respond, opting instead to read her book. Terry glared at her for a few moments to regain her attention, and was about to say something until he heard someone yelling their names.

The Hufflepuff trio all turned around and watched as Hermione ran toward the group while dragging Ron and Harry behind her. 'Oh, Merlin. Susan must not be happy right now.'

As if in response to Hannah's comment, the Hufflepuffs noticed the main doors behind Hermione fly open and a none-too-pleased Susan moving in their direction. They had little time to consider that, though, as Hermione reached the group and immediately commanded, "Ernie, Terry, I need you to act as witnesses for the party last night."

Ernie seemed to go as white as a sheet. "What?"

Harry gulped and tried pulling his arm out of Hermione's grasp. "Hermione, please listen to me. Let's go ask someone else. Ernie won't be able to help."

"What are you talking about, Harry? Of course he'll be able to help." Hermione glared at Harry for a moment before turning to Ernie. "Thesetwo _gentlemen_ behind me seem to have had a little chat about me last night and don't remember exactly what was said because of one too many shots of Firewhiskey. I need you two to clarify some things."

Hannah's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "What are you talking about? Why would Ernie or Terry be able to help you figure out what Harry and Ron said at some party?"

"Exactly," Ernie yelped before taking a step back, moving him out of Hannah's visual range. He then began to move his hands palm-forward in the universal "stop" gesture. "I was studying with Terry in the Ravenclaw common room, so I couldn't have been partying with Harry or Ron."

Hermione glanced at Harry and Ron, who were both looking very nervous at the moment, before responding. "But Harry and Ron said that you two were at the-"

"You just said that Harry and Ron were too smashed to remember a simple conversation about you," Terry countered. "What makes you think that their recollection is well enough to say that we were with them?"

"Those are two completely different-"

"Okay, sorry about the misunderstanding!" Harry yelled as he and Ron grabbed Hermione and began pulling her away. Harry maneuvered Hermione and Ron around a slightly panting Susan, who finally caught up with the group. "Hey Susan, sorry but we have to run. Hannah, guys, we're sorry about the confusion. I guess Ron and I were more smashed than we realized. We were sure that we didn't see either of you two, but we had to make sure. Check all loose ends and whatnot!"

"But- but Harry," Hermione sputtered. "You said Ernie and Terry were at the party."

As the group of Gryffindors moved steadily away from them, Hannah turned to Ernie. "Do you have anything to say for yourself?"

Ernie bowed his head and muttered incoherently, causing Terry to sigh and answer. "It's not his fault. The guys were pressuring him and it took me basically both bribing and blackmailing him to go. Neither of us drank a drop and we all swore to keep Ernie's name out of any conversation. Apparently those two idiots broke that agreement."

"Really?" Hannah drawled. "And exactly what did you bribe and blackmail him with?"

"Well," Ernie mumbled. "I've been saving up for this necklace with a pendant shaped like a Deku Scrub. Since I know that you like plants, and a Deku Scrub is some weird plant-magical creature thing, I thought you would like it. They offered to give me some money to help pay for it and called in a favor since they kept me from being attacked by Malfoy's crew a few times."

"Why would they go through so much trouble to get you to go?" Hannah snapped.

"Because," Ernie replied, "We're all good friends and Terry refused to go without me. If I didn't go, then Terry didn't go, which in turn would've dissuaded most of the other Hufflepuffs since we're considered the most popular guys in our house, which would have made a bunch of guys Ravenclaw decide that the party wouldn't have enough people to be any fun. We're apparently that good at making any party 'the place to be.'"

Hannah narrowed her eyes for a moment before huffing and turning away from him. "Fine, fine… I'll reserve judgment until I calm down. But don't think I'm letting you go so easily, mister! Anyway, what happened between you and Harry, Susan? Did you snag him before Hermione dragged him down here?"

Susan, looking visibly disheveled, stood in silence for a few moments. "This is not my day. First I try to implement 'the plan' but Harry suddenly makes his own move, Hermione interrupts, and now I have to choose between chasing those three around the entire bloody castle or waiting until Hermione is done with whatever crusade she's running now."

"Oh, come on, it can't be that bad. Look, the boys and I will go with you to occupy Hermione while you get Harry alone elsewhere. After all, Hermione can't be after anything all that important, now can she?"

* * *

"Hermione, are you nuts?" Harry muttered as he pulled Hermione to run faster, moving them out of earshot from the Hufflepuffs. "Are you trying to get Ernie dumped? Hannah has always – ALWAYS – stated that she will never tolerate drinking. It took several assurances that no one will utter anything about his involvement with last night, a bit of gold, and a bottle of Ogden's Red – RED, Hermione! That's some high-quality drink – to get the man to come."

Hermione took a moment to digest the information she was given. "I thought you said you only invited Gryffindors and everyone else just showed up, and why would you even want Ernie to show up if convincing him was that expensive?"

Once the trio got back into the castle, Ron let go of Hermione and looked at her as if she'd grown another head. "Are you serious? Ernie is amazing: He's funny, smart, and witty, knows and understands more about the female population of Hogwarts than any other boy in the school – bar Fred and George when they were here – and Ernie knows how to make even the quietest shut-in a party animal. Plus, we owe him for 'accidentally' getting into some tight spots with Malfoy and his pack of sycophants in order to allow us to cut in and release some stress."

"There's also the fact that most of the boys tell him all of their dirty little secrets, like who they like and some of the more illegal activities everyone gets up to at night." Harry added.

Ron nodded in agreement "We couldn't _not _invite him, and had to ensure he went. He has enough dirt on the whole school to make our lives hell otherwise."

Hermione frowned. "Ernie is not that petty. Besides, he shouldn't be hiding things like that from Hannah."

Harry sighed and shook his head. "Look, if Ernie wants to experiment with a little drink in Hogwarts than that's his own business. Everyone does it at least once. Why should he risk losing Hannah because he wants to see what cutting loose does to him once while in the care of a group of guys who will do anything to keep the man out of trouble? Besides, Ernie doesn't blab about other people's business because he's generally happy and carefree. I would hate to see what Ernie does to anyone who made him unhappy by exposing _his_ secrets."

Ron nodded vigorously in agreement. "They'd either be expelled, or a complete social pariah, before the day was done. You don't want to make a happy Hufflepuff angry."

"Then who can we ask about what happened, if not Ernie and Terry?" Hermione snapped. "They're the two most reliable witnesses!"

"You can always ask Dean or Seamus about what happened."

Hermione tolled her eyes. "Fine, but if either one of them make **one**sex joke I'm going to ensure they won't be able to again."

The trio made their way, once again, through the halls of Hogwarts in search for yet another student. After stopping off at Harry's room to pick up the Marauder's map, they quickly made their way back to the first floor where they found Dean, Seamus, Ginny, and Lavender playing a game of exploding snap in an abandoned classroom.

Dean quickly noticed the entrance of Gryffindor's famous child heroes and smiled. "Hello all, what brings you to our little hideaway?"

"We're on a mission to gather information, with which you can help." Hermione stated. "Do either of you remember what happened at the party last night?"

"Mostly," Seamus replied. "Everything after Colin started dancing on the tables becomes a bit of a blur, but everything else I remember."

"Ha! I win then. I remember almost the whole night, even up to the point where we all decided to leave Corner lying on the poker table half-naked."

"Wasn't it your fault he was half naked, Dean?"

"Now's not the time to be splitting hairs, Seamus. Besides, weren't you too drunk to remember?"

"_Anyway_," Hermione interrupted before the two stooges could lower her IQ further. "I was wondering if either one of you remembered the conversation Harry and Ron had concerning the progress of our relationship."

"Oh yeah," Dean nodded. "Ron was being a bit full of himself that night."

"Uh-huh," Seamus agreed. "He sang so many songs and limericks that even _I_ got sick of 'em. He did do a smashing rendition of '_The Banshee and the Mummy are Gonna Dance All Night'_ though. It sounded like two starving cats fighting over some milk."

As Dean, Lavender, and Ginny roared in laughter, Hermione folded her hands and huffed. "Can we get back on topic here? Did Ron, at any point, claim that he and I have ever been intimate?"

"Aye, he did." Seamus confirmed. "He went on and on about your bedroom antics all night, after telling everyone about how Harry isn't allowed to date anyone."

"Ha!" Dean piped in. "That proves that I remember last night better. Ron didn't say anything like that. He stuttered an' tripped over his own tongue while you were trying to guess what Hermione was like in bed. Ron never confirmed none of it."

Seamus waved his fist threateningly. "Are you calling me a liar, Dean? I'm a man of me word. I'll clean your clock if you try to call me a liar again."

"I am calling you a liar," Dean stood up. "After Harry talked about wanting to have an actual girlfriend for once before leaving Hogwarts, you started embarrassing Ron. The boy was so red in the ears I'm surprised they didn't burn off!"

Ginny stood abruptly. "Whoa, Harry said _what?_"

"I'm tellin' ya, Ron said that he lay with her!"

"And I'm telling _you_ that he didn't!"

"So Harry said that he never had a girlfriend before? Then what the hell was I?"

"Gin, now's not the time."

"You're just sayin' that Ron's innocent because Hermione's been helping us with homework more now that she's dating Ron!"

"And you are saying Ron's guilty because you like watching couple drama!"

"Harry-"

"Gin, not now!"

"You lying-"

"You sneaky-"

"EVERYONE SHUT UP OR I'LL BAT-BOGEY HEX ALL OF YOU!"

The entire group, even Hermione, jumped and took a step back in fright as Ginny walked up to Harry with murder in her eyes. She stomped her feet and positioned herself in the most intimidating pose she had ever seen her mother use. It appeared to be working. "Dean, exactly what did Harry say about never having a girlfriend?"

Dean, clearly scared for his nose, stammered frightfully. "H-he said that he wanted to h-have a girlfriend once before gr-graduating from H-Hogwarts."

Ginny's eyes narrowed as they focused on Harry. "And what did he say about me?"

"That you didn't r-really count because you two never went out anywhere."

Ginny's eyes widened before narrowing into slits once again. She was so angry and focused that she didn't even notice four Hufflepuffs slipping into the room. "So… I never counted as a girlfriend, huh?"

"Now Ginny," Harry raised his hands and took a step back. "I didn't exactly mean it like that."

Ginny seemed to get angrier at Harry's statement, if her twitching eyebrow was any indication. "Oh? How did you mean it, then? After all, there are _soooo_ many ways to interpret 'She doesn't really count,' now is there?"

Harry stood tall, ready to defend himself, and prayed to every god he knew of his voice wouldn't quiver. "Look, all I meant was that we never really had a chance to do what couples in Hogwarts normally do."

"Really? I thought we did. What do you call the time we spent in the common room, or the empty classrooms?"

Harry racked his brain for the best way to phrase his answer without making his situation worse. After all, a wrong answer could end in batwings sprouting out of his nose or a black eye. Unfortunately, talking to girls has never been his strong point. "Socializing."

The boy ducked slightly as a beam of light flew just over his head. "Socializing!? I don't see how sticking my tongue down your throat counts as 'socializing.'"

"It seemed a common enough activity."

The conversation was put on hold as Harry dodged another set of spells. He was highly impressed (although he wouldn't admit it at the moment) at Ginny's competence with magic, especially since Ginny didn't even have her wand out. "What _exactly_ are you trying to say? That I'm some sort of… of _scarlet woman_?"

Harry raised his hands up once again in a placating gesture, while also silently constructing a solid but invisible magic barrier, before answering. "No, all I'm saying is that we have different views on what dating means. I think dating is when you go out for an evening stroll and sneak off to Hogsmeade to have some fun. Why else would I have made my first date with Cho a trip to Hogsmeade? Your definition of dating with me, Michael, and Dean mainly consisted of a good snog here and there."

"Well, I never-"

"-Yeah you did." Harry, Dean, Seamus, and (surprisingly enough) even Hermione interrupted.

Ginny was so taken back that she pulled out her want and tried to bat-bogey hex Harry, which failed when the spell slammed into his shield and the two negated each other. Harry reached out and hissed "_Expelliarmus!_" and managed to disarm her.

Now realizing that she no longer had her wand (although clueless about her earlier wandless spell casting), Ginny slumped her shoulders and asked. "What do you mean, Harry? We went on dates. We flew together at the Quidditch pitch, and don't tell me you didn't have fun when did that!"

Harry sighed and pulled Ginny into a half-hearted embrace. When the younger girl didn't try squirming out or killing him, Harry smiled. "Look Ginny, those times were fun but they couldn't really count as dates, could they? Our 'flying dates' were directly after Quidditch practice and I usually stayed late to fly around anyway. And our times in the common room were fun, but there was no effort or planning in those events. That's stuff we could've done at any time, for any reason. A real date, to me, is doing something we normally wouldn't like my earlier examples. I don't usually wander the halls at night, and I never sneak into Hogsmeade for any reason. Those are real dates to me."

Ginny shoved Harry away. "Then why the hell didn't you take me out, then? You're the man complaining about never having been on a date, but you set such high standards and you didn't even try to take me on one!"

"Because," Harry calmly stated. "There was never enough time. We saw each other for two months, and that was right before we had exams. Either one – or both – of us had other things to do all the time. If I had invited you out, would you have been able to say yes?"

Ginny looked away, unable to respond, and finally noticed the new guests in the room. "Hey, what are you four doing here?"

Susan huffed. "I was in the middle of a study session with Harry when Hermione dragged him off. I'm here to take him back so we can finish our session."

Ron snorted while attempting to hold back his laughter, prompting Hermione to elbow him. "I'm sorry, Susan, but I need Harry so we can figure out what happened last night."

"Well then figure out what happened without him." Susan snapped. "I don't want my grades to suffer because you're curious about some random gossip about you."

"I don't see how their 'studying' would've helped her in anything other than sex-ed." Run muttered to Lavender and the two other Gryffindor boys standing on the sidelines.

"I need Harry here to ensure Dean and Seamus tells me what happened last night." Hermione explained to Susan, hoping Susan didn't hear her sometimes idiotic boyfriend's not-so-quiet muttering. "Without him, Ron might lie or omit something that Harry wouldn't. I'm looking for total honesty, and by Apollo's tongue I will get it!

"Then do it when Harry is free to be dragged around without interruption," Susan retorted, "like tonight or tomorrow when I'll be doing my Herbology homework."

Hannah, who had been steadily getting more annoyed at the chaos before her, decided to intervene before Hermione and Susan said something they would later regret. "Hold on you two. Everyone needs to calm down for a moment so that we can straighten everything out, one subject at a time. First, we'll let Ernie here explain what is going on between you two, and then Ginny can continue venting to Harry about… whatever she's mad about now."

While Ginny looked severely put out, everyone nodded in acquiescence. Ernie took one step forward, but before his mouth could open the door did instead. With it came the entrance of Professor Flitwick.

The tiny man smiled jovially to the occupants of the room, who all froze in shock and some embarrassment. "Well hello all, I'm glad to see your studies haven't eaten so much of your time that you cannot socialize with your peers. It is good to see inter-house socializing!" The shining smile on Flitwick's face left no doubt to everyone that he was being sincere. "Now I'm sorry to interrupt, but I need to steal Harry away from you for a few moments."

Seeing several women in the room about to object, Harry quickly asked, "May I ask why, professor?"

"Oh, it's nothing serious I assure you!" Flitwick replied. "I was just speaking with the Headmaster our new Potions Professor when your name popped up. Dumbledore felt that it would be best if you met with the new professor since you two apparently know each other, and kindly asked me to come retrieve you."

"Wait," Ron interrupted. "You mean you found a new Potions professor already? I never thought you would be able to after what just happened to Slughorn this Halloween."

The other Hogwarts students nodded in sympathy. While Slughorn appeared to be the first Potions Professor anyone actually learned from, the hope that he would continue teaching was crushed two weeks prior with an incident involving Neville Longbottom, a hair restoration potion, and an errant sneeze. The result was catastrophic; no one could see Slughorn because of several layers of Hair that made him look like a short, dome-shaped fur ball that communicated through squeaks that could be heard from deep within the nest of hair.

Flitwick didn't seem effected by the memory, though. "Well of course the Headmaster did! You can't be expected to completely lose your last year of potions education because of one simple accident."

"I doubt Slughorn considers that accident simple," Dean blurted.

"Oh posh, he'll be fine. He'll be good as new within six months if St. Mungo's has anything to say about it. Queries aside, I think we should be moving along now, Harry."

Harry nodded, and was about to move to follow the Charms professor when a hand on his shoulder stopped him. It was Hermione. "Sir, do you mind if we tag along? We were having a somewhat serious discussion, and I'd like to get back to it as soon as possible."

Flitwick paused and stroked his considerably long beard (although it could not exactly match Dumbledore's) before answering. "Well… the headmaster didn't say anything about Harry having to come alone, I don't see why not. Some of you may have to wait outside, though; the Headmaster's office would be very cramped, otherwise.

"It's all good," Seamus piped in. "Dean and I don't really need to go. We had a good game of cards going here." Internally he added, '_plus I don't want to be near Hermione when she finds out what really happened between Harry and Ron, regardless of who said what!'_

Everyone else was eager to see the new Potions professor, though, so before he knew it Flitwick was escorting an extra four Hufflepuffs and four Gryffindors with himself and Harry to the Headmaster's office. The walk there was quiet enough, with only the occasional guess as to who the new Professor was. Harry, not inclined to guess, simply asked. "Professor, who is the new Potions Master?"

"Oh ho, I'm afraid I can't say Lad." Flitwick chuckled. "I was asked to keep it a secret until you arrived." As the group arrived at the stone Gargoyle, Flitwick said the password ("Blood popsicles") and asked everyone to wait a moment at the entrance. "I need to check and see if it is okay for all of you to enter at once, so please bear with us."

With that, Flitwick shimmied up the stairs as fast as his tiny legs would take him. The group was surprisingly quiet, with no one talking. Everyone either had nothing to say, or felt it wasn't the right time to say anything. Luckily, they didn't have to wait long before Flitwick returned and gave everyone the okay to enter.

Harry was in the front of the group heading into Dumbledore's office, and he immediately recognized the woman before him. He first noticed the woman's long silver hair that reached the perfectly well-proportioned bum which was currently hidden from sight by a set of luxurious pale-blue robes that wrapped around her nicely. Her face still held the wide eyes, perfectly set nose, and full lips that he remembered. "Apolline? You're the new Potions Mistress?"


	4. Distractions

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Harry Potter, or any other character in this story. And after months of promises and excuses, I have finally posted this chapter.

**Notice: **I just noticed a huge Plot hole where I've stated Dumbledore is both Dead and Alive. I will fix that little mistake within the next week or two.

**Gossip  
Chapter 4: Distractions  
By: Nanio-713**

Harry Potter has very good instincts. He needed them as a child in order to know which way to turn around corners, and where to find the best hiding spots when trying to keep himself from getting beaten up by Dudley. When that became second nature, Harry then used it to keep himself out of Vernon and Petunia's way, and keep the punishments to almost nothing. After discovering that he was a wizard, Harry's instincts kept him up to pace, or even one step ahead, of those who wanted to kill him since he started Hogwarts.

Of course, they've also gotten him into more trouble than he can shake a wand at. He trusted his instincts, but he won't follow them blindly.

That is why Harry also has an incomparable amount of willpower. He can even throw off an Imperious from the Dark Lord. So, when the impressive Aura of a full-blood Veela slammed into him and his instincts demanded to take her on the Headmaster's desk, which she was immediately in front of, he used that willpower to beat that instinct into a far corner of his mind, where it could plan a recreation of the situation in the room of requirement… except without so many people.

"Harry!" Apolline greeted in an only slightly accented tone as she walked toward the boy in question. "It is so good to see you."

The full-figured Veela swiftly embraced Harry before leaning back just enough to gain access to Harry's face, where she placed a soft peck on each cheek. Apolline then gave him a light kiss, although it lingered too long for some of the younger girls in the room's comfort. "How have you been, Harry? You have hardly sent me a note since you returned to Hogwarts."

Harry blushed as Apolline still hadn't released him from the embrace. Then again, he hadn't released her either. "Well, I've been busy keeping myself out of trouble. That's a full time job, you know! If I drop my guard for one moment I may end up finding myself fighting another Troll or Dragon, and we can't have that now can we?"

"It's good to hear you've been keeping yourself out of trouble, Harry," said the Headmaster. "But one must wonder at how long you will be able to keep it up."

"Not very long if he keeps that up," mumbled Ron before being elbowed by Hermione.

The brunette quickly stepped forward to address the Headmaster, more impatient than ever to get back to her earlier plans. "Professor Dumbledore, Professor Delacour, I mean no offense but may I ask why Harry needs to be here? We really were in the middle of an important conversation-"

"I have no doubt, Ms. Granger, that whatever you were doing before I summoned Harry here was very important." The Headmaster interrupted. "However, I must ask that you postpone those matters for a moment, as Harry needs to fulfill one of his Head Boy duties."

Harry blushed lightly. It had taken some time to get used to the idea of being a Head Boy, especially considering he had never even been a prefect. "Yes sir, Professor Dumbledore. What do you need?"

"First off, I would like for you to call me Albus," The Headmaster's eye twinkled merrily. "After defeating the Dark Lord, you've more than earned the right. Secondly, I need you to show Mrs. Delacour to her new furnishings and classroom, and then answer any questions she may have to ensure she knows how to get around the castle. As she has decided it would be best for her not to take the rooms in the dungeons, please take her to the largest empty classroom in the eastern section of the fourth floor."

"Very well, Albus." Harry acquiesced before turning to his friends. "I'll catch up with all of you later."

The other students nodded briefly before Harry turned to Apolline and offered his arm. The beautiful Veela gracefully accepted it, and the two gracefully made their way out of the room.

Before they could walk out the door, however, Dumbledore quickly added, "Oh, and do try to avoid running into too many students on your way to her quarters. I'd like to try to keep Mrs. Delacour's appointment quiet until Monday."

Harry nodded and made his way out the door. Seeing as the meeting was apparently over, the Hufflepuffs and Gryffindors quickly exited the Headmaster's office and began meandering through the hallways, in no particular rush to get anywhere. After all, Hermione still wanted answers from those around her to spill what happened the night before, and the 'Puffs had no plans now that Susan's "plan" was officially thwarted.

"Great," Hermione huffed. "Now we're going to have to wait until Harry comes back before I can figure out what happened yesterday."

"No you don't," Terry stated. "I can easily tell you right now. I have no reason to lie, and didn't drink so there's no way I could be mistaken in what happened. Although I _would _like to know what you're planning to do once you find out the truth."

Hermione was hesitant to answer. "Well, I… I'll make sure whoever lied to me won't do so again."

"How?" Terry inquired. "By breaking up with Ron? Are you going to stop being friends with Harry? Or will you Curse either so badly they will have to go to the hospital wing?"

"Of course not!"

"Then what does it bloody matter?" Terry pressed, "Both Harry and Ron had a spat yesterday, which led into a bit of rumors. Big deal; this sort of thing happens all the time. Is knowing exactly what happened going to have any permanent effect on your feelings for either of them?"

For once, Hermione had no answer.

"Exactly. And for your information, Ron didn't say you two shagged." Ron let out a sigh of relief. "But he didn't make a very good case that you didn't either."

Ron froze in shock, once again, as Hermione glared at her boyfriend. "Really? What do you mean, Terry?"

Terry grinned and took a moment to appreciate the fact that everyone was hanging onto his every word. "The note Fred and George sent Ron did say he got 'into the bookworm's knickers,' but Ron denied it. That sent everyone into a back and forth about that 'trio dating rule' which sent Harry and Ron into their little tiff…"

* * *

"_That's drunk logic," Harry countered._

"_It's still logic, damn it." Ron grumbled. "You can't date until we break up."_

"_Then I feel bad for you come tomorrow, Ron." Harry replied, grinning like a loon._

"_Oi, you're sounding pretty confident there." Seamus piped in. "That's pretty hard to believe, considering Ron's already gotten into Granger."_

"_Yeah mate," Dean added. "You really think you can break that up? Anyone who can make a girl howl like Ron did Hermione must be doing something right."_

"_Sod off__, I told you it's not like that." Ron sputtered for a few minutes, trying to break through his alcohol-induced haze to find the right words. "Hermione's too… subtle for that stuff."_

_Dean fell off of his chair laughing. "What do you know about subtle, Ron? I know you're drunk now!"_

_Ron tried to glare at Dean, but failed miserably. "Look, it works like this; you get a kiss here and there, then if you do it right she'll squeak. It's not like she's made my head explode from senso… censor… sensory overload or nothing."_

"_Ugh," Seamus groaned. "I don't need to be knowin' bout your head explodin'."_

_

* * *

_

Silence reigned for a moment while Hermione digested this new information. "That has got to be the dumbest thing I've ever heard."

"I think my intelligence just dropped because of hearing that." Hannah agreed.

Ernie and Terry shrugged. "I told you it didn't matter if you knew, but _noooooo_! You just had to know what happened. C'mon Ernie, I wanna see what people have been saying about how Colin was at the party yesterday, or what ended up happening to Michael."

"What are you talking about?" Hannah called after her boyfriend and his best friend, all thoughts of punishing the boys for going to a party temporarily on hold. "What happened with Michael and Colin yesterday?"

X X X

**A/N:** I recently realized I've misspelled the name I gave Fleur's mum in the last 2 chapters. It's supposed to be "Apolline," not "Appoline." Also, I now this is half the size of the last chapter, but it's been sitting on my hard drive **for over a year now** with very little change, so I thought it best to simply post this as is and move on rather than attempt to improve it. Maybe _now_ I'll finally muster up the creativity to start writing the next few scenes I have in my head.


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